15 Jun, 2011

Love Lessons from Dogs?

"Dogs do the types of things we should do more often, and the things they don't get involved in — well, we should really skip them, too” according to Harrison Forbes, dog trainer and author.  Read on for five lessons you can learn from dogs.

1. The reassurance of forgiveness
In order to have successful relationships, letting bygones be bygones is crucial. An inability to get over issues and move ahead is a key roadblock to happiness. Dogs, Forbes notes, are always in the moment and therefore don't hold grudges or hang onto resentment. "Dogs wipe the slate clean many times a day," he explains. "If you are grumpy and yell at your dog, but then wait a minute and act like you never did, he will forgive you — many times over. If humans could let the little things go as easily as dogs do, their relationships would be better for it."

2. The security of unconditional love
Forbes says that as a rule, when a dog loves his owner, that bond is lasting and real. "It's interesting to note that celebrities are over-the-top pet lovers," he says. "This is because their dogs really love them for who they are, not their A-list status; a dog will always treat you the same. Dogs offer truly substantive relationships in a way most people don't," he notes. When it comes to relationships, humans should strive to emulate a dog's focus on what a person really offers in terms of love, kindness and warmth, he advises.

3. The comfort of consistency
In any relationship, consistency can be quite comforting. "We as humans understand there are different types of behavior, yet we crave consistency," Forbes says. "With dogs, regardless of your animal's personality, you pretty much get the same behavior unless he's ill.”

4. The need to be playful
Forbes notes that most dogs want to have a good time, keeping things light and not so serious all of the time. "The easiest way to burn out a working dog is to work him all the time — that pretty much goes for relationships as well," he says. In police-dog training, Forbes explains, training is balanced with play and fun. "The harder you go at it in a training phase, the more you have to counterbalance it," he says. "It's the same with a relationship — you have to relieve the pressure through play and good times.”

5. The importance of effective communication
While communicating is important in any relationship, it's not merely the act of communicating that will ensure your relationship's success, but finding the way to do so that best matches the other person’s needs. This is a skill that you can easily learn from working with dogs, Forbes says. "The different ways in which I communicate with my three dogs are suited to what works best for them … and for me with them," he explains. "Just as a hot-tempered dog won't respond to yelling and lots of commands, neither will a hot-tempered person. At the same time, some more sensitive types may need a gentler approach. Essentially, no one person or dog communicates the same way — each individual has a unique style, and taking the time to learn about someone else’s needs is the key to a strong bond."


Excerpts from article found at:  lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/articlematch.aspx?cp-documentid=16947053&gt1=32023

I Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

What does today's Story and God's Story teach us about love?

The dog story is a great picture of what real love looks like.  Forgiveness, unconditional love, consistency, fun, and effective communication are all an important part of how we love others.  More importantly than finding them all illustrated in the love of a dog, they are all modeled to us in how God loves us.  
Forgiveness:
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” I John 1:9

Unconditional Love:
“Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. “ Psalm 36:5
Consistency: “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever”Hebrews 13:8
Fun: Nehemiah said, "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10

Effective Communication:
“ He spoke the word that healed you, that pulled you back from the brink of death. So thank God for his marvelous love, for his miracle mercy to the children he loves. “ Psalm 107:17

How can I connect today's story and God's Story to my life? 

I love my dog and I really like today’s article because it is so true that the ways that dogs love us is a good reminder for who we should be.  Sometimes I forget how deeply God loves me or how unconditional his love for me is, but my dog reminds me everyday.  She loves me when I am hard on her, she loves me when I am in a bad mood or forget to feed her in the morning.  She waits for me to come home and through her wagging tail and joyful exuberance tells me that she missed me and is happy to have me home.
Now transfer those emotions to God.  He loves me even when I am angry, when I forget to talk to him, when I go about my day without letting him join me, even when I try to push him away.  Still he longs for me to come back and with much joy and mercy, he lavishes love on me when I return.  
Forgiveness, unconditional love, consistency, fun, effective communication…. I get it all in my relationship with God.
Today, look for the ways you see God bestowing those characteristics on you.  Now think about the ways you can bring each of those qualities to the people closest to you.  In other words, how can you better show forgiveness, unconditional love, consistency, fun and effective communication to the ones you love?
Got a dog?  Give him an extra treat for loving you so well.

How can I connect today's story, God's Story, & my story to my friend's story?

Talk to your friend about how a dog’s love can remind you of what real love looks like.  Ask them what they think is important in relationships and then share the “big five” (forgiveness, unconditional love, consistency, fun and communication) that you are trying to do better in.  

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